Dear Nacle,
The BloggerNacle Snarker is pleased to announce that S. Mack Dazzle and D. Golden Shizzle, formerly of Bloggernacle Smackdown, have joined the ranks of SN Industries LTD. Their posts there were sufficiently clever and amusing, without crossing that tenuous line of bad taste, to merit my extending an offer to them, and they accepted. The deal was closed with an exchange of common stock and palpable threats. There was no disclosure of secret identities.
Dazzle and Shizzle will be posting to the SnarkerNacle without any direct editorial oversight or prior approval. However, if they step out of line, they will be terminated with extreme prejudice and suitable punitive actions will be taken against family members and pets.
Sincerely,
The Bloggernacle Snarker
President, SN Industries LTD.
She's got a smile that it seems to me
She ought to be running Relief Society
Where everything
Is as prim as a hand made doily
Now and then when I see her face
She takes me away to the celestial place
And if I'd stare too long
I'd probably recall the pre-existence
Sweet spirit o' mine
Sweet wife of mine
She's got a dress from Gunny Sacks
patterned with barns and birds
I hate to see her in spandex
And expose her lovely of curves
Her hair reminds me of her wedding veil
When she was a blushing bride
And pray for the ward
And the stake
To calle me to leadership
Sweet spirit o' mine
Sweet wife of mine
Lets go to the Temple now
Lets go to the Temple now
To the Temple we go
Sweet spirit o' mine
We have a lot of angry, upset womyn on the Nacle lately. What is the deal? Someone, who happens to be a female, and wishes to be anonymous (cannot imagine why) suggests she knows the reason:
Hmm. Well, I'm not sure if you meant to imply this in your post about all the feminist stuff on the blogs lately, but maybe all the women on the blogs are starting to get their periods at the same time. That does happen you know, with groups of women living in close proximity to one another.
Check it out:
http://www.menstruation.com.au/periodpages/menstrualsynchrony.html
http://www.mum.org/mensy71a.htm
Apparently, the only Naclerette not in synchrony at this point is Tanya Spackman.
Today is the day when the Bloggernacle Snarker rises early to see if he can see his doggy shadow in the light of the Nacle posts of the day. If there is more light than heat, then the Snarker sees his shadow and its six more weeks of lousy, contrived snarking. If its more heat than light, the Snarker sees no shadow and its on to the low-hanging fruit and easy snarks that are hopefully amusing.
Well, Naclers, what say you? Are you going to pile it on, or what?
"Yo quiero Blogger Nacel."
A stake of the LDS Church in Arizona has recently apostatized and changed its affiliation to the Church of Monday Night Football (have to use the Google cache because the membership of the COMNF has been in arrears in their tithes for some time now). The COMNF will be holding their annual General Conference this Sunday, broadcast nationwide, and the newly converted Arizona stake will be in attendance.
Prayer to be heard in this Sunday's Worship Service, which worship service will be using alcohol-based drinks, unlike the LDS church which uses water. Owing to this abrupt shift, the assumption is there will copious consumption followed shortly thereafter by equally copious vomiting on the parts of the new converts, a traditional rite of passage observed by millions of devout COMNF worshipers nationwide.
Attendance among High Priests, Elders, and Young Men of the newly converted Arizona Stake is anticipated to be at astonishingly high levels, with percentages exceeding those observed while the stake was affiliated with the LDS Church. The predictions are because of the highly effective reactivation program employed by the COMNF Relief Society, pictured below, who's motto is "Silicon never Faileth".
Not sure what happened yesterday behind the scenes at T&S, but a whole slew of posts by angry T&S female permabores hit the Bloggernacle. First, Rosalynde Welch is irritated at being patronized, then Julie in Austin practices what she preaches by inisting women have authority on their heads, so she posts and then promptly shuts down all comments, exercising her permabore authority (but subverted here). And then Kristine Haglund Harris cuts lose on the latent sexism and historical baggage in the church that is even infecting her own son and impacting her own daughter.
Why did all three of them let rip on the same day? And, Rebecca over at FMH tore it up as well. Hmmmm. Is it a coincidence, or did they all have the same source of inspiration? Or, has something happened behind the scenes there at T&S that has irritated the gals? Did Kaimi says something dumb? No, entirely too implausible, I mean the guy never says anything the feminists would find offensive. Was it because FMHLisa didn't win her Niblet? Nah, that would just be petty. I bet I know, Adam Greenwood tried to put his foot down and stepped on some toes. Yeah, that must be it.
UPDATE: additional reasearch into the matter indicates Julie's post was in response to comments in this thread, and Rosalynde's may have been inspired by comments made in this post. So, perhaps Zelophedaddy's Daughters should be thrown into the ring for Queens of Edgy along with MMW and TFtC. Please send gossip to: snarkernacle at yahoo.ca
Kim is apparently confused as to who he is, or at least who he is perceived to be by the Nacle, and so he asks the Nacle to define him, in three words or less (being true to his Terse Subject Line Man superhero alter ego) in an effort to rebrand himself. That, or he has a personality disorder, not sure which, hopefully the former and not the latter.
Anyway, we thought we'd take a whack at it:
Canadian Current Events
Wants More Attention
Just Bought House
Simple Answers Ignored
Notta Big Blog
Doesn't Wear Shoes
North of Border
Likes Red Green
Hrrrrrmmmmmm...what else?
